Emotional intelligence or EI is the ability of an individual to recognise, understand and manage one`s own emotions. It can also be the ability to recognise, understand and influence the emotion of others.
In his best selling book, psychologist Daniel Goleman argues about equipping children with intellectual skills they need to master to succeed in school and life. Parents have to teach their children how to react to positive or negative feelings in order to raise their EQ. Raising an emotionally intelligent child means understanding and caring for his feelings. Some of the key features developed through emotional intelligence involves self-acceptance, keeping in mind other’s point of view and ability to control one’s own anxiety.
Here are 5 ways in which parents can help in developing emotional intelligence in children.
It is important for a child to engage in his favourite hobby or sport. Kids who are passionate about something will always protect their idea. A serious student knows she needs to get her mind clear before her tests. Respecting a child`s interest is paramount in developing high EI.
- Self – Esteem
Parents must always raise a child’s self – esteem, by developing a very healthy and stable relationship with a child which will create a strong bond of self-love and stable internal happiness. Parents can always help the child in achieving their merits whether it means an awesome report card or getting better with their health. Not punishing or scolding children for being emotional also goes a long way for the child.
Many times there are failures in life. One must not get disheartened. More than anything else persevering with a child’s goal can increase his chances of success. Not conveying judgement or frustration enables a child to understand and label his emotions better.
- Encouraging a child how to solve problems
Kids need to know it’s perfectly OK to feel sad, frustrated as long as they find a proper way of doing it. Kids cannot hit anyone in their anger even if they feel like hitting when they are angry at their friends or siblings. They need to find a way out. Parents can help this behaviour by brainstorming with their children. Children have creative minds and can give solutions that parents also will be surprised to hear. Reminding them that all emotions are acceptable but all behaviours are not can go a long way in helping a child.
- Be a good example
Children observe behaviour of parents and mimic the same even when parents are at their worst. Parent’s reaction to a child’s behaviour is crucial to how they will react to unwanted situations.
To have an idea of how your child will be when s/he is an adult one must check the following:
- Does s/he make enough friends?
- How do they get along socially.
- Is s/he able to express and control their feelings?
An emotionally intelligent child will ultimately deal better in stressful situations. They will calm down faster and develop long lasting and intimate friendships. They tend to not only do better in school but also have less negative feelings and more of positive ones. Less violence and negative behavioural issues are also reported from high EI kids. Emotionally intelligent children also grow on to become intelligent leaders as suggested by this post.
One can encourage developmental growth in a loving and a safe environment. One can take the help of a day care centre or hire a caregiver to inculcate loving values and teachings in the child. Moreover having a healthy discussion with your child is by far the most successful way to develop a robust and intelligent adult for the future.